RAIN
by LovingTheOgre
Summary: For Luv4Life. Basically it's Sakura's inner monologue about Sasuke explaining why, in the story, she ran away from the village and the conclusion that first love always ends in heart ache. Read and review the one shot...I've never written her so be kind.


**Rain**

Disclaimer: I dun own the characters at all.

Sasuke: So a one shot for a fan?

Sera: Yup!

Sasuke:...I'm a total ass-hole in this, aren't I?

Sera: Sasuke...you're an ass-hole period.

Sasuke: Point taken.

Sera: My first SasuSaku ever so-

Sasuke: WAIT! HOLD THE FLIPPIN' PHONE! Did you just say SasuSAKU??

Sera: Yeah

Sasuke:...that is so OOC for YOU.

Sera: I'm branching out into actual canon...besides this was a request anyway...

Sasuke: Yeah well...

Sera: What?

Sasuke: I...hate you.

Sera: I love you to!

Sasuke: On with the damn fic.

AU  
--

If I were to attempt to analyze how I came here, to this point in my life, I would have to say it was love.

I blame love.

When I was a little girl I fell in love with the boy every other girl had fallen in love with-foolishly I believed that what I felt was somehow different from the rest and that somehow my love for him would reach his heart. It was a foolish dream I realize-the dreams of children often are.

"You...love me?" He asked. His dark eyes gazed seemingly through me, freezing me where I stood at his door step. They slightly narrowed. "I seem to hear that a lot anyway."

"I can prove that I love you!" I implored. My once wide green eyes stared into his own placid black ones hoping to reach him, hoping that he could grasp what I was saying, what I was feeling and to return it in earnest. My hands clutched in front of me, held tightly against my small chest, I bowed slightly. "I'll do...ANYTHING to prove myself to you."

In all of my 16 years of life, I thought to myself as he stared at me like some kind of fool, that was the dumbest thing to ever leave my mouth.

"Fine." He motioned towards the opened door. "Prove yourself then...how much you love me."

Blindly I let myself in, staring at the plain front room with dim lights. I could faintly hear the TV from the living room but I didn't strain too much to hear it. My heart was thudding too loudly in my chest. I took a deep breath. "Sasuke..."

The door shut.

My eyes widened as he was barely an inch from me, how had he moved so fast?

His lips were on mine in a bruising kiss and I shut my eyes-taking note that his had been opened a second before but not caring of the implications of his indifferent visage.

Hands were at my waist, up my shirt-anywhere they could reach. Fingers ran through my hair, tracing my cheeks. I barely noticed that we had moved until I felt myself lowered on what must have been his bed-at that moment I hadn't really cared. I was in another one of my dreams. Being with him, kissing him, touching him.

Only this wasn't a dream.

Limbs entwined.

Hearts beat together as one.

Sweet pain shot through me.

I was so in love so in that moment, being so close to him, feeling him inside my body and my soul...if only I had watched his impassive dark eyes and listened to the voice in the back of my mind telling my to stop-to not allow him to continue...but I didn't. I pushed it aside because I was in love...

His eyes stared into mine the entire time, his lips twisted slightly in an irritated line that I had identified as his normal face. The only difference in him was the sweat on his brow and the red that ran across his cheeks.

He lowered his head to my shoulder, breath quickening as he mumbled unintelligible things until he stopped moving all together and let out a sigh.

I had never been so happy, I thought as my eyes shut and I fell into a deep sleep.

The next morning I found myself alone.

I sat up feeling no different then the day before and for a moment considered that I may have actually dreamed it all. The fact that I was nude and the slight ache below however indicated that it was no dream-the fact that I was also in a strange room I didn't recognize tipped this off as well.

My clothes had been folded and placed on the night stand for me and I smiled.

I dressed and made my way to where I assumed was the kitchen-following the scent of eggs and bacon down the wooden hall.

He stood with his back to me staring out of the window over the sink. It was raining out.

"Morning." I said with a smile. I walked around the table to reach him, placing my hands around his waist. He stiffened and shrugged me off.

"Sakura..."

"What is it?" I asked slightly confused. We had been with one another the night before, to me that was the ultimate declaration of love-he had made love to me. Why wouldn't he look at me.

After an eternity he finally faced me, his dark eyes looking very much like the night before. Indifferent to any emotion-unfeeling and cold.  
"Last night...what we did...I was a mistake."

"Mistake?"

He nodded.  
"I let my guard down-I'm sorry for taking advantage of your feelings."

The way he had said it, as though he'd accidentally broken a toy of mine...as though it were no big deal...

"...So you...it meant nothing to you then?"

"...I'm sorry..."

I refused to cry. I stared indignantly into his eyes, anger clouding my own. "Answer me...damnit you could at least do that!"

I wish now that I hadn't made him answer.

"No...it meant nothing." He said looking away after forcing himself to answer.

"Oh..."

That answer had destroyed me.

It didn't take long to be sent on a mission with him and the old team. Kakashi noticed the difference between us but said nothing, I guessed he'd noticed that whatever was between us was better left buried.

Naruto noticed nothing of course which I was thankful of.

The mission had been rather difficult-protect some prince from assassins and what not was the regular sort of thing however no one, not even my dear Sasuke had realized that there had been a bomb set near the hotel.

I was caught in it-thankfully and survived.

Not that he or anyone else knew.

Faking my own death was rather easy as well as leaving my life behind. It wasn't as though I was particularly happy with myself. I had given myself to someone completely selfish on the off chance that he might like me. When I had told Ino she had of course supported me but had also given me a rather long lecture-it was strange that she was disappointed in me. I thought that she at least would be proud.

That was five years ago-now I stand in the Hokage's office staring at my once teacher. She seemed to buy the story of amnesia at least and pardoned me after much coaxing from Naruto and Shizune.

"You look...well you've definitely grown into your looks." She said. Naruto made a huffing sound.

"She was always beautiful to me..." He mumbled.

I had really missed him.

From Naruto and Shizune I had found out what had gone on since I was away.

Ino was married with two children while the rest of her team were single-though apparently Chouji was a regular Casanova. That had made me laugh.

Lee was Jounin with his team and surprisingly married to TenTen-while I was surprised since I always imagined Neji and TenTen I was glad. At least they were happy somehow right?

Shino and Kiba were Jounin and had recruited Sai as their 3rd member since Hinata had runaway-so to speak- to get married. This surprised me, Hinata had always loved Naruto and was such an obedient girl. I was surprised further to learn that Hinata's husband and father to be of their first child was the Kazekage himself. Hinata and Gaara...who would have thought?

"So I'm kinda surprised..."

"Why is that?"

"You haven't asked about Sasuke."

We were sitting at Ichiraku's, Naruto and I, staring at one another for a breif moment. In all honestly I wanted to know about Sasuke the most but at the same time nothing at all.

I looked away.

"I haven't asked about Kakashi either..."

"Yeah but Sasuke...I mean...wow...you over him or something?"

"Something like that."

Naruto nodded.  
"Ok...I'll tell you anyway. Sasuke's jounin..."

"Good for him..."

"...and married."

Married...I wonder who the poor woman is...how much hell her life must be to be married to such an unfeeling monster.

"Oh?"

"Yeah they are really happy."

"Happy?"

He nodded.  
"Yeah-they're having a kid pretty soon-there's even talk of him quiting as a ninja for a while. He wants to be closer to the Missus since she's so close to having the baby."

Happy. He was happy...with a family, a wife, a child.

How could he be happy with anyone but me? I loved him! Always, then still...now.

"...Do you know where he is? I mean, it's been so long I'd like to see him."

It didn't take to long to find him in the training grounds. Standing with his broad back against me like that day, and eerily it was raining. Naruto, feeling a strange atmosphere had decided to leave soon after we arrived. It was then that I knew that he knew what had transpired five years before. I felt so ashamed.

"Sakura."

"Sasuke."

He seemed so similar yet so different when he finally revealed his face to me. His face had grown angular, his body still lean but muscular-oddly the same and oddly new. His eyes were the most different. They were warm and kind.

I didn't like those eyes.

"So I hear you're happily married...anyone I know?"

"Where have you been?" He dodged the question.

"Mist. I worked at a grocery store and lived alone."

"I see."

We were silent again.

"Sasuke."

"I'm sorry." He said suddenly.

"What?"

"For that night, for the morning after and the days that followed...I was so horrible to you. I lied when I said it was nothing, it meant so much to know how you cared and to be close to you I just didn't understand what I was feeling. I thought, that if I pushed you away then I was doing you a service...I was so screwed up back then."

That was the first time I had hugged him in the entirety that I had known him without being pushed away. He was warm and inviting.

He lightly pushed me off after a moment.

He wasn't mine to hold.

He began to walk away.

"Sasuke wait!"

He stopped.

"Sasuke...if I wouldn't have disappeared...would we..." I didn't dare finish the thought out loud.

The rain around us fell harder, cold water seeping through out clothes.

"...yes..."

Then he was gone.

I was left there, standing alone staring at the empty spot where he had been. My hands clasped tightly against my now developed chest like that night and I slightly bowed, my heart swelling with just that word...

'Yes.'

And that was enough.

--

**Sera I've never written Sakura like this before I hope I did it right even though it was OOC even with Sasuke...anyway I hope you liked it LUV4LIFE.**

Sasuke: Read and review but no fames

Sera: damn straight.  



End file.
